Enduring Love? Couple Relationships in the 21st Century Survey Findings

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2.5 Support and advice seeking

Women and men both indicated that they would use couple counselling as a source for support, help or advice before individual counselling. However men suggested that they were generally disinclined to consult anyone, while women indicated that they would consider turning to both couple counselling and individual counselling.
3. Survey Findings Open questions
3.1 What makes participants feel most appreciated

Saying thank you and thoughtful gestures were prized most highly by all participants. Recognition of the time and effort required to complete the

6 everyday mundane tasks which underpin relationships and the smooth running of a household, was also highly valued.

The need for good communication was identified as important by all participants. Open conversations were valued as a means to both touch base with one another and unburden the stresses and strains of the day. Surprise gifts and small acts of kindness were valued highly, with a cup of tea being singled out as a significant sign of their partner’s appreciation. Bouquets of flowers and boxes of chocolates were seen as less important than the thoughtfulness behind the gesture.

Sharing the practicalities of household chores and/or family responsibilities was viewed by mothers as something that particularly demonstrated appreciation. All participants valued the time and energy devoted to cooking.

Saying or showing love featured for all participants. Saying I love you appeared to symbolise the closeness of the couple relationship and provide individual affirmation and reassurance.

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